Top 10 songs you’re embarrassed that you used to jam to

Everyone has musical guilty pleasures. Whether it’s the Hannah Montana soundtrack or nineties boys bands we all used to love, your secret can stay locked up. That’s what headphones are for, right? However, these ten songs in particular are felonies we’re all guilty of enjoying.

The past decade has been chalk full of musical face palms, but we listened to them over and over again anyway. Remember that one time the Black Eyed Peas performed at the Superbowl? It’s okay, we’ve erased it from our memories, too. How about that old Nickelback CD buried in your collection? I know it wasn’t a gift from your aunt. You bought it they day it came out, didn’t you? DIDN’T YOU?

Hey, it’s okay. We’re all guilty of having a love affair with some of the worst songs ever composed. Reminisce with us as we count down the top ten songs you don’t want to admit you used to love.

10) Fergie’s “London Bridge” (2006)

The biggest mystery of the year 2006 was what is Fergie’s “London, London Bridge” really and just why does it want to go down. We may never know, but despite this perplexity, Fergie had us grooving in our cars and singing along in the clubs to her hit (even though we don’t want to admit it now).

9) Sisqo’s “Thong Song” (2000)

Sisqo knows that you wanna show that thong, th –thong, thong , thong. Why he had to dedicate an entire song to this particular article of women’s lingerie, though, I’m not exactly sure. But… it’s just so catchy! Also, can we take a moment to appreciate the particular dexterity in the line, “She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck.” Can’t get much more romantic than that.

8) Flo-Rida’s “Low” (2007)
While we’re on the subject of women’s clothing, can we discuss shawty’s Apple Bottom jeans and boots with the fur? It wouldn’t be my first choice for a clubbing outfit, but I guess she pulled it off, cause the whole club was looking at her. This song was no musical masterpiece, but we loved it. Plus, at least it had some subtle product placement for a particular clothing line.

7) Black Eyed Peas’ “My Humps” (2005)

Before Fergie flaunted her London Bridge, it was all about her lady *ah hem* lumps and humps. Don’t get too close, though, or they’ll get you drunk. In this pop arrangement, we also learned how Will.i.am likes his breakfast cereal – he mixes milk with his cocoa puffs. There you have it, folks. Warning: don’t listen to this song or it will be stuck in your head for days.

6) Nickelback’s “Photograph” (2005)

You totally rocked out to this song before Nickelback got uncool. It’s okay, I won’t tell anyone. This song even makes you feel nostalgic for high school for a whole second, until you remember that high school actually sucked. Nickelback may know how it feels to sing with more than just a steering wheel, but that’s what we did every time “Photograph” came on the radio in our cars.

5) Rebecca Black’s “Friday” (2011)
Ah, the Youtube phenomena we loved to hate. “Friday” may have been the stupidest song ever, but don’t pretend you didn’t sing to yourself “gotta get down on Friday!” at the end of every week in 2011. Additionally, young Rebecca also shares Will.i.am’s affinity for breakfast cereal in the mornings.

4) Lil Wayne’s “Lollipop” (2003)

In this song, Lil Wayne creatively alludes to his encounter with oral sex with the chorus “She lick me like a lollipop.” Despite its lack of sophistication, some of us may have sang along to this song in the kitchen and then denied to our parents that we knew what it meant. (Or was that just me?)

3) 50 Cent’s “Candy Shop” (2005)
50 Cent takes Lil Wayne’s idea even further in this song about a whole shop full of candy! The rapper will generously let you lick the lollipop until you hit the spot (whoa). The one thing I never got about this song is why the candy shop seems to only sell lollipops. Where are the fruit Gushers? Or the fudge? Okay, I’ll stop.

2) Young Money’s “Bedrock” (2009)
Flintstone creators and animators William Hanna and Joseph Barbera roll in their graves every time this songs plays. Nevertheless, the pun that’s at the base of the chorus is just so bad it’s good. I wonder if Fred ever made his and Wilma’s bed rock, too? (Ay oh!)

1) Lil Mama’s “Lip gloss” (2007)
And the number one song we’re embarrassed to have jammed out to goes to Lil Mama. Even better than a song dedicated to thongs, lollipops, or humps is a song about lip gloss. We haven’t danced around to this one in years, but maybe we’ll pull out our Lip Smackers and lip sinc in rooms just for old times’ sake. Shhh.

Image: Youtube Screenshot